Resisting temptation from Rabbi Avigdor Miller Z"L

QUESTION:  Here's a big question, it needs three hours to answer this. How can one resist temptation in today's wicked world?
ANSWER: And the answer is, in one sentence, cut loose from the world. Does it make sense, here's a man who happened to take hold of a thorn bush, and the big thorn sank into his flesh, and he's shouting, "Look it's bleeding, it hurts". So people say to him, “Dumbbell, first thing is let go!”

Here's a man sitting in front of a television and saying to his wife, how can we get rid of this wicked world? Take a hammer and give one smash and you're finished with the wicked world. If you continue to bring the New York Times into your house, what do you expect?! If a man brings in dead rats into his house, into his dining room, and lets them ripen on the floor, will he complain about the odor?

So you cut loose from the wicked world. You have nothing to do with the wicked world, and you'll be amazed what an immediate remedy it's going to be. Now if you're talking about wicked world, a world of crime, that's a different story. But if you're talking about a world of Rishus, of bad character, of immorality and so on, so you heard in one sentence what to do. Cut loose!! And you'll be surprised; you'll be gratified at the results. Now how to cut loose, however, that's a big subject.

You know, the Sefer Tehilim is a Sefer of coming close to Hashem, it's full of ways of speaking to Hashem, Emunah, Bitachon, Ahavas Hashem. Everything is in Tehilim, by the way. Tehilim is a wonderful text book of coming close to Hashem. But the very first Kapitel, the first chapter of Tehilim, is an exception, it's a queer chapter. It starts out, "Happy is the Man who did not walk in the ways of the wicked". All of a sudden he's talking Mishlei, that's not Tehilim, he's giving advice. He's not talking about love of Hashem there; he's talking about cutting loose from the wicked.

The answer is this: What's the use of talking about coming close to Hashem, what's the use of talking noble ideals, when you're still in the company of the wicked, if you're mingling with them all the time? It's Tovel V'sherets B'yodo, how can you go and purify yourself when you're still holding a dead Sherets (creeping creature) in your hand? So the first thing is, in Tehilim it tells you first of all get rid of the company of the wicked, Cut loose from the Reshaim in every way; we are tied to them in thousands of ways. Cut loose! And then you're a candidate to learn the great lessons that Tehilim has in store for you.
 
This is transcribed from questions that were posed to Harav Miller by the audience at the Thursday night lectures.


To listen to the audio of this Q & A please dial: 201-676-3210

The after effects of sin.

Hashem did not punish Chava right after her sin.  In general Hashem does not punish us immediately after we sin because Hashem does not want a world of robots.  Actually, we are punished right away, because our neshamah is effected in such a way that we are more likely to sin again soon.

from a Shiur on Naaleh: Mother of Mankind

Teacher: Rebbetzin Tziporah Heller Class: In the Merit of Righteous Women

Don't fall into temptation.

Last night I went to a Shiur by Rebbetzin Heller. she was talking about overcoming Nisyonot.  She pointed out that when Yosef was in Potifar's house and Potifar's wife wanted him, he thought that he had failed the test because he wanted her too.  Despite the fact that he thought that he had failed the test, he did not give in and fall into temptation further.  He strengthened himself with the image of his father and didn't give in.  He could have said, " I failed the test, the sin is even just wanting her, and I did want her, so I might as well do whatever I want since I failed the test" but he didn't do this, he realized that even when you do something wrong you should stop then and there and not do anything else wrong.

To My Star Pupil,

I am writing this letter to let you know what I think of you. Up here in heaven things are not like they are down on Earth. Over there, people only know what they can see. If they see a person is "successful", they think that he is the greatest guy. When they see somebody struggling, they think he might be one of the weaker elements.

Let me tell you something. Hashem gives every person certain abilities that nobody knows about down where you live. Some people are capable of tremendous things, while others were put there for much smaller purposes. Only Hashem in His infinite wisdom is able to give every person exactly what he needs, to reach his potential.

I'm very misunderstood. Most people hate me, and I don't really blame them. Most people think that my job is to make sure that they fail in all aspects of mitzvos, and that I rejoice every time they sin. This is the furthest thing from the truth. Did you ever watch a boxing coach train his student? It is really a funny sight. The coach will put on gloves, and fight against his student. At first, he won't hit him so hard, or throw his best punches. But, as the student gets better and better, the coach will start to fight him harder and harder. He does this so that the student will improve his skills, and become the best boxer he can be. This is where it gets strange. Every time the coach knocks down the student, the student gets yelled at!! But finally, when the coach threw everything he has at his student, and not only does he withstand the beating, but he knocks the coach down, there is nobody in the world happier then the coach himself!

This is exactly how I feel. If you fail right away, and don't even try to fight back, I see that there is not much talent to work with, and so I take it easy on you. But if you get back up swinging, I realize that I may have a real winner here, and so I start to intensify the beating. With every level that you go up, I increase the intensity of the fight. If you finally deal me a blow that knocks me out, I will get up and embrace you and rejoice with your success.

Sometimes my job is very disappointing I see a person with a lot of potential and I start right in on him. He fights back for a while, but when the fight gets too tough, he quits and just remains on whatever level he was on. (And he usually ends up going down!) I feel like yelling at him, "Get up you fool! Do you have any idea how much more you could be accomplishing?!" But I am not allowed to do that. I just leave him alone, and go try to find another promising candidate.

I've chosen you to be the target of my more fierce battles, and it wasn't for no reason - you have tremendous ability! You were born into a very special family, you have rabbeim who really care about you, and parents who would help you grow in torah and mitzvos. You are a very respectful and kind person.

I am writing to you now, because I have a very serious request to ask of you. Please don't stop fighting! Don't give up! I have been beating too many people lately, and I am losing patience, Believe in yourself, because I would not be involved with you as much as I am if I didn't think you could beat me.

Know what your strengths are! A great rabbi once said: "Woe is to he who doesn't know his weaknesses. But, 'Oy vavoy' to him who doesn't know his strengths - for he will not have anything with which to fight."

Always remember one thing: you have a secret weapon at your disposal. I shouldn't really be telling you - but I will anyway. Hashem himself is watching our "training" sessions very closely. I'm pleased to inform you that He's rooting for you! If things should ever get tough, almost too tough to bear, just call out to Him with a prayer, and He will immediately come to your aid. I wish you the best of luck, and I hope that after 120 years when your time is up in that world of falsehood, you will come up here to the world of truth, where I will be waiting for you with open arms to congratulate you on your victory, and personally escort you to your place next to the Kisey HaKavod.

Sincerely, and with great admiration I remain,

Your Yetzer Hara

This is a letter that is going around, and I wanted to share it.

The power of an action.

We don't realize the power of an action. When we do something wrong once we feel bad. When we do it again we start to think that it is not so bad. When we do over and over we start to think it is permitted. The opposite also holds true. One small action in the right direction can bring us to real change.
from a Shiur by Rabbi Efraim Wachsman

There is a very powerful saying in OA- just do the next right thing.

The stronger your emunah, the weaker your anger and rage.

...A person might be home and hear a terribly loud crash. he looks around and sees that an expensive object has fallen and shattered. Naturally, he will get agitated and angry.

The truth is that one who lives with real emunah will find that the stronger his emunah is in such situations, the weaker his anger and rage. he knows that it was not his son or the strong wind that broke the object, but Hashem Himself!

However, it is obviously very difficult to maintain such equanimity in a highly stressful situation. you must therefore prepare for such eventualities by striving to internalize the awareness that Hashem alone is running the world during peaceful periods that are free of stress. If you do not prepare in this way, when a stressful situation arises, the inclination to fly into a rage will be extremely powerful...

Bilvavi Miskan Evneh, part 2 page 84

We have to work hard to develop ourselves in peaceful times so that we have the tools to respond correctly in stressful times.

Overcoming temptation as a preparation for Shavuos

Hashem responds to us like a mirror.  When we expose the Elokus within ourselves Hashem comes towards us.  The time of the Sifiros Haomer leading up to Shavuos is a time when we are able to reveal this holiness within ourselves.  Shavuos is a time when we can see and hear Hashem's revelation.  How do we bring out the Elokus within ourselves? Every time we have a temptation and we overcome the temptation and we break our physical nature we are taking the Elokus that is within us and bringing it to the forefront. The more that we do this the more that we are developing our own holiness.
This day, Shavuos, is the purpose of creation.  A person has to imagine the power and awe of Kabolos HaTorah to understand what our neshamas are living through. We have to use this opportunity for growth.
The only one who is truly free is the person who is occupied in learning Torah.  We have to make ourselves free from all temptations and devoted to the Torah. Sometimes the temptations of the world are so overwhelming that we think that we are in a jail, but it is not true, we do have the ability to break free of our Taivahs (desires). 

Torah  is so sweet that if we were to taste the true taste of Torah we would give up all of the temptations of this world to do nothing but learn Torah. The real neshamah of the peson is the same in a gadol as in a simple person, the only difference is that the gadol worked on himself to bring it out.  On Shavuos we have the opportunity to grow and bring our holiness out.  We have to daven that Hashem should allow us to feel the tree sweetness of Torah so that we can desire nothing but Torah

from a Shiur by Rabbi Wachsman, "Reaching New Heights, Powerful Perspectives on Shavuos"


from the Chofetz Chayim Heritage Society

Preparing for Shavuos.

Every time that we have a Taivah(desire) for something physical and we deny it, we are elevating the spiritual side of ourselves and making ourselves a more spiritual person.
from a Shiur by Rabbi Wachsman, "Reaching new Heights, Powerful Perspectives on Shavous"

Avoiding tempation.

From a Shiur by Rabbi Ayreh Carmell about Ki Tisa from Aish Audio

How did the Yetzer Hara get so much power over the Eruv Rav that they came to do the sin of the Golden Calf. They had just had an experience of divine revelation that even prophets don't have and get they fell so far. Their problem was that they let the Yetzer Hara in the door. When it first approached them it was in the guise of wise men discussing the amount of time that Moshe was gone. They never should have entered into a discussion with the Yetzer Hara. Once they let the Yetzer Hara in the door they were powerless.

We have to learn from this that we should keep entirely away from temptation. Even just a little bit can cause destruction. This is why we put so much emphasis on abstinence, it helps us not to let the yetzer harah in the door.